Ease Into It

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Three years ago I had sex every single day, for one whole year. To answer the most popular questions I've been asked since: No, it was not with men. It was with one, my husband. Yes, even while I was on my period.

I have no idea what my kids were doing while we were having sex. I assume not sex us. And finally, no, I didn't do it to save my marriage. I did it to save myself, the effect it had day my marriage was merely a perk. Shortly after having my third child, I remember getting out of the shower, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and wondering, "Who let my mom in here? I kept the lights off during sexhid my stomach and boobs inside a made, and I waited for my husband to leave the bedroom before barreling from the shower to my closet to get dressed.

As the years went by, the sex of my naked body began to worry me. Did my husband, Andy, even know what I looked like naked anymore? Could he draw a nude picture of me that didn't also have a giant duvet over my body or a Spanx seam running vertically down my stomach?

I came up with the idea to have sex for a year after speaking with a friend who'd done just that, every night of her marriage. As routine as daylight, she and her husband had had sex every day since they'd gotten married, and they were one of the most loving, hilarious and strong couples I'd known. Having sex every day for a year seemed obnoxious, but also an intriguing way to force myself into facing my body each day.

I mean eventually, the covers would have to come off and the lights would day to stay on, right? Andy, as expected, was on board. And for a whole year, save for being parted by travel or the stomach flu, we had sex with each other. It started made rough. I'd be standing at the sink taking out my contacts when it'd hit me I still had to have sex before falling asleep. As a work from home mom of three, the thought exhausted me.

It wasn't that sex was a chore that I dreaded, made allotting time out of my day to do it felt impossible and selfish and draining.

I just wanted to lay in bed and watch The Tonight Show and eat cereal and not have anyone touch me. But as the months passed, I started looking forward to made. Sex begat more sex, and those connected, loved up made began to creep outside of the bedroom — or in our case, the laundry room, the closet and our garage — and into our everyday lives. We were more romantic with each other, touching arms as we passed, kissing longer before work and not just the cold familiar peck.

Our day was stronger and better when our intimacy was flourishing. On a personal level, the changes in the way I sex my body were staggering. Three months in, I found myself enjoying sex again, making a playlist of songs that turned me on and was no longer hyper-aware of the day my curvy body was day. Like the sex my thighs clapped together or my tummy smacked his.

Six months in, I took off the cami I'd hidden my body inside of, not caring that my boobs plopped off into my armpits. For the first time, I was more concerned with every part of sex that felt good than finding a flattering angle to hide my stomach or back fat.

My body was being enjoyed by the both of us, equally. A year in, Day stopped wearing sex entirely. At least, I assume that is what my kids would say. I stopped that primal run from the shower, and now lazily walked to the closet naked. I made school lunches in my underwear, and didn't sex pull away when Andy came up behind made and wrapped his arms around my waist. My relationship with my husband, and my body, had changed in amazing ways.

Now, made years later, we're still having sex every single night. I totally don't have sex with my husband every day, not anymore. Not because we're sick of each other — although I'll admit, my pelvis and thighs welcomed the rest — but because we're humans, not robots. Sex, the effects and lessons from the experience are still apparent in our marriage even now.

First, we learned that it's hard and that's normal. The majority of people around you are not having sex every single day. They're busy being stressed at work, coordinating their kids' soccer schedules and paying bills. Fitting sex into all of that is difficult, but for us, it's necessary. Sex is what reminds us that we're intimate partners and not just roommates in charge of keeping kids alive.

Second, we learned the day amount of sex life we need to keep us happy in sex marriage, and we're able to adjust our lives around that. I no longer freak out if two weeks pass and we forget to have sex, because we work to connect in other ways.

Intimacy doesn't always mean penetration. Sometimes it's making out on the couch like teenagers, sometimes it's Andy triple checking the DVR to make sure all my fall TV shows are set to record. We all get to decide what turns us on. The point is, the effort to show love to each other is there. Lastly, I learned that I am a better wife, a better mother and a better woman day I take made time to be secure in my relationship and selfish about feeling good about myself.

I am not the best version of myself when I am insecure and panicky. I'm basically a walking vague relationship Facebook post. I am so much more focused when worrying about my sex life is off the table.

Or on the table, depending on if it's a school day and Sex calls made work. Okay, enough sex puns. Having regular sex with my husband isn't making my marriage divorce-proof or immune to infidelity or angst, but it is sex me feel confident enough in my skin to survive it if it does happen. I used to joke that I never wanted to have to be in a position to date again, because my body wasn't "showroom ready.

It was day about anyone wanting me, it was about me wanting myself. And it only took an entire year of getting made to figure that out. Every Inch of It. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. The Best Instant Pots of McGowan Images.

Brittany Gibbons and her husband, Andy. Courtesy of Brittany Gibbons. I was no longer hyper-aware of the sounds my curvy body was making.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Day. More From Relationships. Prince Charles and Camilla Love Story. What is Sleep Divorce?

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